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I hope you are encouraged by this blog... as the Lord leads me so I will write. Trials of life... joys of knowing our Father.


Its hard to be clay... that is why it is so important that we grow in our trust of Him whose hands we are in. It hurts to be shaped and molded... it does. But God is still God and He is still to be trusted.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Thankful... and bazooka gum

1989: Matt 10, Me 7
Doesn't Matt look protective of me?
 I am thankful... thankful Matt was my brother for my first 8 years 2 months and nearly 1 week of life.  I am now 28... and I look back on a tragedy that was traumatic yes... but I trust a God (the only God) who has proven Himself throughout history as one who is worthy of being trusted.  And I hold onto hope... hope for my emotional healing, hope for a future not wrought in failure and despair, hope to come through with a "faith that can walk in the dark" (Dr. Kellemen), and hope of joining my brother Matt in Heaven when the Lord determines that my time and service on earth is through.
My mom just picked up a new CD today and I heard these lyrics in the last track:
         
           "Knowin' what I know about heaven... believin' that you're all the way home...
            knowin' that you're somewhere better... is all I need to let you go... 
            I could hope that I could pray you back... but why on earth would I do that... 
   when you're somewhere life and love never ends.. oh, knowin' what I know about heaven" 
                                                                                                           (Guy Penrod)

        I wonder how many trees in heaven he's climbed ...or sports games he's played... bazooka gum... swimming pools... water slides... camping and hiking trips... sledding and biking hills... the list goes on.  But you know what?  Heaven is so much better than the best things on earth can even compare to.  Matt's probably so caught up in singing to Jesus that he hasn't even missed all those boyhood thrills from over two decades over.
And so I let him go... as I hold on to and cherish our childhood memories. 


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2 comments:

  1. erinFebruary 21, 2011 at 8:49 PM

    Sadie, it's so refreshing to read a post like this from you. The Lord is truly working in your heart and healing is beginning! Praise God!

    ReplyDelete
  2. the RamirasFebruary 28, 2011 at 3:49 PM

    thank you for sharing these pics, memories of your brother and your journey of healing. We continue to pray for you, and look forward to the day you can introduce us to your brother Matt.

    Continue to press on.

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